I Can Keep Your Secret
by checkmyspanish
Summary: He's the soccer super-star. He's the quite little nerd. They've been friends since childhood. A closet case and openly gay. Hormones are raging and patience is wearing thin. Can they keep the secret? - 'Tis a Drabble.
1. Prolouge

**Summary. **

**He's the soccer super-star. He's the quite little nerd. They've been friends since childhood. A closet case and openly gay. Hormones are raging and feelings are emerging. Can they keep the secret?**

Prolouge

_Dribble._

_Dribble._

_Dribble. _

_Fake left. _

_Move to center. _

_Shoot. _

_Score. _

_Bask in all the glory. _

When I looked into the crowd, I saw everyone I needed.

Everyone.

Except for him.

I really fucked up this time.

How the hell am I ever going to fix this?


	2. Love is a Secret

**Hiya! I'm new to this. But I've got s strong backbone so criticize my writing all you want. I won't mind. It's a Drabble so I'm thinking 100-200 words per chapter? Yes. Hopefully you guys will like this! Enjoy. xx**

Chapter Uno

_Shower. _

_Dress. _

_Eat. _

_Leave. _

"Have wonderful day, dear!"

"You too, Mom!"

_Drive._

_Drive. _

_Drive. _

_Wait. _

"Sorry I'm late, Man. Dad was trying to set me up with one of his colleague's daughters. "

"Again?"

He nodded.

"You'd think he would know by now."

"Ignorance is bliss"

_School. _

_Journalism._

_Spanish III._

_Orchestra._

_Lunch. _

_Eat._

_Ap Chemestry._

_Ap Geometry._

"So, I'll see you after practice?"

"Your parents won't be home?"

"In Seattle visiting family, they won't be back 'till Tuesday."

_He sighs._

"I wish you'd tell them"

_I sigh._

"You know why I can't"

_Silence._

"Fine. I'll wait for you."

_His day-old stubble feels fucking amazing under my lips._

I walk out from behind the wall.

_Our wall._

_Love isn't supposed to be a secret._

_But He is._

**Alright, so this is based on a true story unfortunately the ending isn't as great. **

**Carmen xx**


	3. Dark Grey

**If you're not comfortable with gay sex.. get out. **

Chapter Dos.

_Lower._

_Lower._

_Lower_.

"Fuck. Jazz, your tongue is amazing."

_Just a little.._

_Lower._

"Fuck."

His mouth around my cock.

_Somotherfuckingood._

_Soft gold intertwined in my hands._

"So good, so fucking good, Jazz."

I moan.

He moans.

He sucks on my balls, stroking my cock.

_So close._

I nudge his head. "Jazz, I'm going to come."

He stays.

I look down.

_Dark grey._

_Fucking beautiful dark grey._

I nudge again.

He stays again.

"Shit!"

I come down his throat.

And he swallows.

I pull his up to my chest, holding his fucking beautiful face whilst I kiss him.

_Soft._

_Plump._

_Hershey's Chocolate. _

I stroke his hard cock through his briefs.

"You hard for me, Jazz?"

He whimpers.

"So fucking hard for me. Right, baby?"

He whimpers, nodding.

I reach inside and fist him.

"This is mine. Say it. It's only mine."

I gripped harder.

He nods.

"Say It." I growl, nibbling in his neck.

"Yes! Fuck, yes! Only yours, Edward!"

I smile.

_He is mine._

_Only mine. _

_And He knows it._

_**Olymipcs. I'm obsessed. I just absolutely love those men in spedos. Cullen Jones, Tom Daley, Ryan, lemme lick you. & Have you seen the USA Women's Soccer team play? jesusfuckingchrist. It's like sex on a soccer field. They are phenomenal athletes. + National Mexico Soccer team is going to the quarter finals for the first time in HISTORY. finally. **_

_**Any favorite Olympic athlete/sport? **_

_**- Carmen. xx**_


	4. Sky Blue

**Frank Ocean's "channel ORANGE" in the background. **

Chapter Tree.

Dribble.

Pass.

Run.

Shoot.

Repeat.

Dribble.

Dribble.

Pivot around defense.

_Sky Blue._

Fall.

"Fuck."

"C'mon, Mason! Get off your fucking ass a get back there!"

Sigh.

I look up.

Chocolate brown hair an Sky Blue eyes giggle.

I wipe my face with the sweat-soaked FORKS SOCCER t-shirt.

Drills.

Run.

Drills.

Run.

Whistle.

_Breath._

"''Kay, boys. Hit the showers"

Shower.

Dress.

Leave.

"Hey!"

I turn around and see chocolate brown and Sky Blue walk towards me.

"You're Edward, right?"

I nod. "Yes."

"I'm Bella."

She's cute."

"Nice to meet you."

She smiles.

"Yeah. So, I was wondering, if maybe, you'd like to hang out sometime?"

My eyes dart to Sad Grey.

"Sure," I smile.

We exchange numbers and agree to go out sometime.

. -. -. -. -.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

_Soft gold curls intertwined in my hand._

"So, who is she?"

I shrug. "Her name is Bella."

His finger's play connect the dots with the freckles on my chest. My nails run up and down his strong back.

_So soft._

"You think she's pretty."

It wasn't a question.

I don't answer.

He starts to get up but I hold his hips firm to mine.

"Let me go, Edward."

The tone in his voice is demanding.

_So fucking cute._

I feel myself get hard.

I roll on top of him.

"What's wrong?" I whisper.

He turn his head.

I grip his jaw and run my nose down his neck.

_Hershey's Chocolate._

"I don't like you going out with girls."

_Love is jealous. _

_Love should never be jealous._

"It's just a date. Just for show. It doesn't mean shit. You know that."

Grey looks away, avoiding Green.

"Look at me, baby." I plead.

He reluctantly does.

"I love you."

Grey softens and smiles.

"I love you, too."

_Soft. _

_Plump. _

_Hershey's chocolate._

_Love tastes so sweet._

**Hiya! So, I noticed people view or "visits" but don't review… I don't mean to sound annoying but, please? With a chocolate covered Ryan Lochte topped off with Nathan Adrian? Sound yummy, huh? (;**

**Ever had the person you have a crush on date someone else?**

**Jealousy fucking sucks. **

**Carmen xx**


	5. Never Say No

Chapter Cuatro.

"Favorite color?"

"Red. Favorite snack?"

"Deffenitly chocolate pop-tarts."

She wrinkles her nose. "Gross."

I laugh.

Cut.

Chew.

Chew.

Swallow.

Drink.

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.- .-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.- .-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.- .-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

**Come over.**

**I can't.**

**Please? I miss you.**

**I just saw you Friday.**

**Doesn't mean I don't miss you. **

**I can't.**

**Why?**

No reply.

_Wait. _

_Nothing. _

_Wait. _

_Nothing. _

_Wait. _

I check if the phone is even on.

It is.

_Nothing. _

Shower.

_Nothing. _

Homework.

_Nothing. _

Sleep.

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.- .-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.- .-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.- .-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Monday morning and still nothing.

Sure we've fought before.

It's always the same.

"_Tell your parents."_

"_I can't."_

"_Tell your friends."_

"_I can't."_

"_Tell someone, god damnit!"_

"_I can't."_

I never can.

I always say I'm sorry.

When I arrive at his house in the morning, he's already gone.

We only have one class together, Chemistry.

I don't see Him until then.

He smiles but doesn't reach his grey.

His beautiful dark grey.

They're hard.

Stone hard.

_Love is pissed._

Since it's close to Christmas Break, Mr. Stagner just makes us watch a movie.

I pull his seat closer to once the light goes off.

Careful not to make noise.

I lean in.

"Come over."

He keeps looking straight ahead.

" I can't"

"Why?"

"I've got stuff to do."

"Like what?"

"Something that doesn't concern you."

I chuckle.

He sighs.

I trail my hand down his thigh.

He stiffens.

I promise to be good.

His breath picks up the more I move my hand to his belt.

"Please?"

He bites his lip almost breaking sin.

"Come over." I say again, fumbling with his belt and rubbing his hard cock through his briefs.

He nods.

_Love can never say no._

_Love can never say no to me._

**A/N: So, uh. He's a douche. Like I said before, this is based on a true story but I guess I confused some of you. The ending in this fiction is so much better that what really happened. /: It was a hard year for him. But he's better now & couldn't be happier.**

**I need a Betta, yo. Any volunteers?**

**Every time I see a review or that someone has favorited or followed I just want to jump through my laptop and cover you in kisses! In the most non-lesbian way, of course. **

**Oh, fuck it. I'd do it the MOST lesbian way possible. Because I just LOVE you guys that much. Even if there's only like 3 of you ^.^**

**So what's your views on the whole Chick-Fa-La fiasco?**

**Carmen xx**


	6. If I Could, I Would

Monster by Lady Gaga in the background. How hardcore am I? c:

Chapter Cinco.

Thrust.

Hard.

Thrust.

Deep.

"Edward! Edward! Don't stop!"

Thrust.

_So tight._

_Always so tight._

"Fuck. Edward, please!"

I grip his hips.

"Please what?"

Hands in my hair.

Legs around my waist.

"Harder!"

_Fuck yes._

Soft.

Plump.

_Hershey's chocolate. _

I groan.

I bite his neck, breaking skin.

Hot breath in my ear.

"Edward."

Thrust.

"Edward."

"Jasper. You feels so good, baby."

I feels his muscles tighten around me and his twitch between out lower abdomens.

It doesn't take me long to come after.

_Love is so good._

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

"I'm sick of this."

I look over to see Love glaring straight ahead. "Sick of what?"

He looks at me, mouth open and eyes hard. "Of you, asshole! You and your stupid lies and your stupid secrets! I'm tired of being your dirty little secret, the thing that you have to hind in front of your family and friends!"

I ran my hand through my hair. "I'm sorry."

"You know, you always say that but you never really mean it. I have feelings you know." He sighed.

I just sat there, my head against the wall.

_If I could, I would. I would do it. I would give up everything for Him because He was It. There was never going to be someone else. He is my Love. _

"If I could, I would."

Silence.

Tension.

Thick tension you'd have to cut with a butcher knife.

"It's not the matter of being able to, Edward. It's the matter of you won't. You don't care that everytime I see you kiss her, hug her, laugh with her that I wish so much that was me, that you wouldn't be embarrassed of me, of us. It hurts. It hurts so fucking much, Edward." Tears threatened to spill.

_Love should never be hurt. _

"I love you, Jasper."

He jumped to his feet. "God, you are such a liar! You don't love me, you never have! You use me for when you need your fix of a quick fuck and then ditch me to prance around with her all over town. And I alright with that because I loved you and I thought you loved me too. I guess I was wrong." Tears were spilling down his cheeks. He looked broken.

Worn out.

Tired.

Hopeless.

The light in his Greys when we first began this was gone.

"I can't do this anymore, Edward."

I didn't say anything and he didn't wait for me to.

As soon as the words left his mouth, he left.

_I had hurt Love._

_I had made him hurt._

_I am an ass. _

_I am going to fix it._

A/N : I'm sorry, guys ):

I've been so busy. It's August and that means all those classes that I thought would get me ahead are coming back to bite me in the ass. Yearbooks, gauger, photography, band, soccer, band again. + it was my little sister's birthday over the weekend, she's 12.. so old. AND I had a game on Sunday, so pooh.

Did you guys see the USA's Woman Soccer team kick ass? HOLYFUCKINGJESUS. Going for the Gold! Alex Morgan, guys, Kudos to her.

& Mexico's Men's Soccer team is going for their first medal in soccer for the first time in HISTORY! They've never even made it to the quarterfinals! I'm so very proud of them, I embrace my Mexican heritage and when people do something like this to make me even more proud… it's just so encredible. To say I'm excited for Saturday at 2:00 pm, is an understatement. Like my mother screamed while we watched the game via skype and Mexico scored the goal a minute till the end, VIVA MEXICO! VIVA EL TRI, CABRONES!

Question : How old were you when you had your first heartbreak?


	7. BoomBoom

_Adam Buckley's Musical Autopsies in the background._

_It's like someone decided to combine a sexy Canadian voice + funny critiques about the poor excuse of music my generation finds "like so fucking awesome, bro."_

Chapter Sixx.

I saw Him everyday at school.

I sat next to Him everyday in Chemistry.

He never looked in my direction, always avoiding me like I was the plague.

In a way, I sort of was.

And, god damnit, it hurt.

It hurt so fucking much.

_I miss him._

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Christmas break rolled around and I met Bella's parents.

Nice, caring people happy to see their daughter happy.

After we finished the whole meet-and-greet, we went to Downtown Port Angeles, that's when I saw Them.

Holding hands.

Smiling.

Laughing.

_Fucking holding hands. _

_Fucking smiling._

_Fucking laughing._

I wanted to run over there and kiss the living shit out of Him.

I wanted to march over there and get on my knees and for him to forgive and take me back.

I wanted to storm over there and fucking him right there on the sidewalk by that damn frilly coffee shop in front of his little laughing-smiling-handing hands fucking wanker friend.

I wanted to claim what was mine.

Was, being the key word.

Not anymore.

I didn't run to kiss him.

I didn't march to get on my knees and beg.

I didn't storm over there to claim.

"Oh, look! Isn't that Jasper? You guys are friends, right?"

It wasn't until I felt my arm being roughly pulled that I saw golden curls get closer and closer.

I could feel my heart race.

_Boomboom boomboom booomboom._

Dark Grey looked up and met Green.

_Boomboomboomboomboomboom._

"Jasper, hey! What are you doing in Port Angeles? Who's your friend."

He moved his eyes from me to Bella. "Well, I'm just here visiting my aunt for Christmas. And this is Garrett... my boyfriend. Garrett, this is Bella and Edward, some friends from school."

_Boyfriend._

_Boyfriend. _

_Fucking boyfriend. _

"It's nice to meet you, Garrett," She beamed.

_Friend. _

I'm some fucking friend?

"Yeah, nice to meet you, Garrett," I gruffed out.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

**We need to talk. **

**About what? **

**How about who that fucking guy is? You don't need him, he doesn't fucking know you like I do. He doesn't love you like I do. **

**He might not love me, but he treats me a shit load better than you did. **

_Ouch. _

**Can we talk? Face to face? **

**When?**

**Tomorrow afternoon? My place.**

**Garrett is taking me to a club tomorrow.**

_The hell he is! _

**Please? Tell him you have some family stuff to do. **

His replay came an hour later.

**Fine. **

**A/N: - enter Jaws theme song here - **

**As I mentioned in the beginning of this chapter, waaaay up there, I have been listening to Adam Buckley's voice sine 10 am this morning. Best thing there is to YouTube. I know what you're thinking, listening to some hotfuck canadian comically criticize top charting shit music is entertaining for you? Well, for your information, he comically criticized other things, too! Anyways, go check him out on YouTube: **_**ADoseOfBuckley **_**or go to his website: **_** /dose/**_

**He's like so totes awesome. **

**REVIEWS ARE BETTER THAN ADAMA BUCKLEY SEXY CANADIAN VOICE. ;D You'll catch my drift if you actually do listen to him talk. ^.^**


	8. Forget Reality

**My boyfriend trying to sing Lana del Ray's, Born To Die. He's too cute. I very highly recommend you go listen to her, so fucking amazing. + it kind of goes with this chapter.**

Chapter Siete.

_Soft. _

_Plump. _

_Hershey's Chocolate. _

I pulled Him over to straddle my lap, His bare chest covering my covered one.

When it's just us, clothes is unnecessary.

"Edward," He moaned

_God, I missed that._

"Edward," he panted in my neck. "More."

I reached down and teased the skin above his briefs, only letting my fingertips slide inside. "Tell me you love me."

Dark grey looked up.

_Sad dark grey looked up. _

His hand cupped my cheek. "You know I love you."

I reached inside and stroked him.

_So warm._

_So hard. _

_Because of me._

"Promise me you won't leave me again. " I gripped the base of his cock, letting my thumb swipe of over the slit using his precum as lube.

He hissed. "Promise me you'll tell."

Green met Grey.

I didn't answer.

He didn't push me to.

We both knew we'd break those promises.

Soft.

Plump.

Hershey's Chocolate.

"I need you, Japser. I need to be inside you."

Clothes off, condom on.

_Fuck. _

_So tight. _

_So warm. _

_God fucking shit. _

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

I woke up and smiled when I felt His gold curls rub against my neck.

_This is how it's supposed to be. Him in my arms and not in some fucking wankers. _

I got up, careful not to wake him, and went to the kitchen to get started. I noticed Mom left a note on the fridge, **Went with your father to Seattle to visit MeeMa, be back on Saturday for Christmas.**

_Well, another week without the folks, what's new?_

Chocolate chips.

Eggs.

Milk.

Pancake mix.

Mix.

Pour.

Add Chocolate chips.

_Wait._

"Are you making me breakfast?" I felt His arms wrap around my waist, his head resting in between my shoulder blades.

I smiled. "I though the boy I love would like some of his favorite breakfast."

I could feel his perfect smile on my left shoulder blade. "Thank you."

We ate and for a moment we left the outside world.

_It was entirely too short lived. _

**A/N: So, I just wanted to say that I really just love every sing one of you that has followed, favotited and reviewed. I mostly don't answer reviews because I feel awkward when I do. But I love them very much. Please, keep them coming. **

**I love you guys so much! **

**Carmen xx**


	9. Jasper Whitlock

**Jasper Whitlock.**

_June 1999_

"What are you doing on my monkey-bars?"

"I don't see your name on them."

"Everyone knows they're mine. Stupid."

I kicked his shin and ran.

I only came close to the edge of the playground when I felt the kid tackle me from behind.

"Say you're sorry!" His knee was digging into my back.

"No!"

I pushed him off and jumped on him, pulling his weird red-brownish hair.

He pulled my neck-length blonde curls.

"Jasper!" I felt my mum's long nails pull me off the stupid kid with the weird hair.

Didn't she know that he started it?

I struggled in her arms and noticed the Stupid's mum was wagging her finger in his face.

I calmed down a little; happy I wasn't the only one getting into trouble.

After her lecture, he sighed and slugged over to me, head ducked down and feet dragging across the playground woodchips.

"I'm sorry for calling you stupid… And for tackling you to the ground."

He had pretty green eyes, like the bushes during the spring in front of our house on Texas. One of his front teeth was missing; he had freckles spread from cheek to cheek. When he talked the left side of his mouth would pull up and you could see a dimple there. Without his weird hair he would be shorter than me.

Didn't his mum ever brush his hair?

"I'm sorry I kicked your shin."

"It's okay."

"You want some of my chocolate?" I reached my hand out full of Hershey's Kisses.

He gave me a crooked smile, the dimple on his left cheeks showing. "Sure."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

_October 2001_

"Did you boys have fun at school?"

"Yeah, but this girls almost gave Edward cooties today during recess!" I laughed because it was really funny but when I saw Edward glaring at me with a blush under his freckled skin, I stopped.

"It wasn't funny," he yelled at me, then turned to his mum. "Mum, I could've died! She almost gave me cooties. That's so gross!"

Mrs. Cullen laughed, "Edward, hunny, girls don't have cooties."

Edward looked at is mum like she had two heads. "Yes they do! That's why they like the color pink and play with Barbie's!" He scrunched his nose as if it was the most disgusting thing.

She laughed again and smiled. "But one day you're going to marry a girl and I bet then you won't think she'll have cooties."

I spoke up with a mouthful of Hershey's Kisses. "Girls will always have cootie, that's why when I grow up I'm going to marry a boy."

Mrs. Cullen chocked on her Starbucks Carmel Cappuccino and looked back at us with big green eyes. "You want to marry a boy, Jasper?"

I smiled, "Yes, ma'am."

Her eyes softened and she gave me the same smile Edward gives me when I share my chocolate. "I'm happy for you, Japer."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

_August 2009_

I nervously chewed the Hershey's Kisses he gave me when he and Mum picked me up from the airport.

I could hear his fingernails pick the shark took of the necklace I gave him for his thirteenth birthday.

"Do you like him?"

"No."

"Oh."

I sighed and finally looked up to get a good look at him since I got back from Galveston. He grew a bit. His shoulders and arms are a bit wider. His hips narrower. His has is darker, like maroon with a tint of red in it. He cut it, too. It wasn't sticking up in every direction anymore; it was shorter on the sides and long on the front. He was starting to have facial hair along his jaw. The baby fat around his cheeks was gone. His skin is all cleared up some but you could still see the spots of acne on his cheeks. The only thing that stayed the same was the braces he's had since fifth grade.

God, I missed him.

"How was Galveston?"

"It was fun."

"I bet it was," he snickered.

I rolled my eyes.

"Was he good?"

I smirked. "You have no idea."

He lifted his right eyebrow.

"Can we not talk about this anymore? I don't need you to know about my sex life."

"I could hardly call it a sex life, Jazz. It's been one person."

"Whatever."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

_December 2010_

"Ashton Kutcher or Brad Pitt?'

"Ashton."

"You're an idiot." I took a bit of my personal brand of heroin. Nothing better than Ben & Jerry's: chocolate Chip Cookie Dough ice cream with Hershey's Kisses and Christmas movies with Edward.

He chuckled. "Like I'm supposed to know what famous prick is fucking hot?"

I shrugged. "Do you want to open your present now?"

He gave me that smile. You know the one that would send a hormonal teenage girl or gay boy down to their knees in front of him in seconds. "Hell yeah! What'd you get me?"

I handed him over the newspaper-wrapped box with Rudolph and Frosty the Snowman stickers.

"Awe, thanks Jazz. You really didn't have to work this hard on the wrapping." His green eyes met my grey for a moment to let me know he was joking before they went down to tear up the newspaper in his lap.

He held up the new orange Nike soccer cleats that he's been begging his parents for since Thanksgiving. I personally didn't see the big deal, they're shoes but Edward has this huge fetish. He's the male Kim Kardashian when it comes to shoes.

"Thanks, Jazz. I love them."

There goes that smile.

I smiled back and took another bit of my B&J.

He reached under his bed and pulled out a perfectly wrapped red, shiny box with a big perfect golden bow. It was too perfect to destroy so I removed the tape, careful not to tear the paper.

"Jesus, Jazz! Just rip the fucking thing."

I looked down and saw the expensive paint set I've been whining about since summer, a bag of gummy bears and gummy worms, two bags of Hershey's Kisses, a small bag of weed and a bottle of Crown.

Have I mentioned how awesome my best friend is?

"Do you like it?"

I jumped in his arms. "I fucking love it! Thank you so much."

He smiled in my neck. "I'm glad you like it."

Wes spent the next two hours drinking hours drinking half of the Crown with Pepsi and me rolling joints for my winter stash.

"You remember last summer when you came home from Galveston and you told me about that guy fucked?" His words slurred.

I looked up to see his green eyes tense. "Yeah. Why?"

"What's his name?"

"Garrett Stone."

"Did you love him?"

I looked back down to my task. "No."

"Oh." He moves down closer to me. "Then why did you do it?"

I sighed. "To get the whole virgin thing over with." Grey met Green. "Did you love Anna?"

"No."

We stayed silent for a while before his drunken ass started talking again.

"Sometimes I wish you wouldn't have let him. You should've waited for someone special. Some special guy that made you happy and told you every day how amazing you are. You deserve that. Not some fucking wanker you met on a three month vacation in Texas. "

My fingers stopped. I was pissed. "Any why is that, Edward? Why didn't you wait for that special girl that told you everyday how smart and cute and talented you are? Why should I wait and not you? God, sometimes you're the biggest shit I know."

His shoulders slumped and his head ducked down. "There is no special girl for me, Jazz. "He crouched down on the ground in front of me. "You really think I'm all of that? You really think I'm smart, cute and talented?"

I could feel the blood rush to my face. "Anyone with eyes and a functioning brain can see that."

I don't know how it happened. I don't know why. But I do know that as soon as I finished my sentence, Edward's mouth was on mine.

Tongue on tongue.

Teeth on teeth.

Lips on lips.

I kissed him back.

He pushed me back his bed and climbed on top of me.

Chest to chest.

Thighs to thighs.

Hard on to hard on.

I pushed his shoulders back.

"Edward, what are you doing? What are _we_ doing?"

He kissed down my neck, is hands running up my sides.

"There is no special girl, Jazz. There's only you. Are you really that blind?" He slurred.

The boy is drunk. "Edward, you're drunk. You'll regret this tomorrow."

His green met my grey. "I'll only regret it if you reject me." His hands slowly pushing up my shirt. I threw my arms around his neck brought his lips back down to mine.

He finally got my shirt off and my hands trailed down to work on his pants. His lips left mine and they trailed down to my neck. He licked, bit and sucked the spot where my shoulder and neck met.

I wrapped my hand around him. "Jazz. Fuck, baby." I rolled us over to straddle his thighs, my hand still pumping him.

I always knew Edward as above average for guys our age, but seriously, whatever higher power there is up there is seriously blessing the boy. I couldn't help but stare.

"Like what you see?"

Stupid, cocky son of a bitch.

I trailed kisses down his chest and licked the very prompt V that led to the Promised Land.

I licked him from base to head. I heard him groan and his head hit the pillow. I sucked on the head and licked slit, one of his hands gripped the sheets by his side and the other tugged on his hair. "Fuck, Jazz. Please, more. Please… Shit." I took as much as I could in my mouth, using my hand to grip what couldn't fit and the other to massage his balls. I felt his hand nudge my cheek. "I'm going to cum. You have to move. Fuck, Jazz, baby, move."

I stayed.

I wanted him.

"Shit… fuck… Jasper!"

I felt him come in my mouth.

I'm not going to lie and say he tasted yummy-licious because it didn't. But it wasn't as bad as I expected it to be.

He rolled us over and started kissing my neck again, pushing my jeans and briefs down. "I need you, Jazz."

No.

No.

No.

This is wrong.

So wrong.

He's my best friend.

My only friend.

My only friend that I just sucked off.

"I can't lose you as a friend for a measly one-night stand that you'll regret tomorrow."

His green eyes softened and he smiled. "Don't you get it, silly boy? I'll only regret it if you reject me."

I pulled his lips back to mine as he reached over to his bedside table bad pulled out the condom. I heard him rip it open.

_This is it. _

I felt the tip push inside before he grabbed my jaw and made me look at him.

Edward has never looked more beautiful. His brown pulled together, his lips parted, a faint blush along his freckled cheeks, his hair hanging on his forehead. He pushed all the way inside. I hissed at the pain. He stayed still, letting me get adjusted as his size. His eyes squeezed shut and his hands gripped the sheets beside my head.

"Move," I begged him.

Green met Grey.

Thrust.

Oh, God.

Thrust.

This is so wrong.

Thrust.

Fuck.

Thrust.

"Edward, more."

Thrsuthrusthrust.

His face dropped on my neck and my nails went to his back.

Thrusthrusthrust.

'Harder!"

And harder he went.

I felt the muscles in my abdomen tighten and his thrusts increasing.

He was close.

I was close.

I moaned like a little bitch.

His little bitch.

"Edward."

"Jasper, fuck. Baby, I'm about to blow." He fisted my cock and I was done.

I felt my cum land on my and his stomachs.

Thrust.

Thrust.

Thrust.

"shitfuckjasper."

His body fell onto mine.

It felt nice.

I felt his lips start kissing my neck. "I love you, Jasper Whitlock."

I ran my hands through his weird, red, sweaty hair. "I love you, too, Edward Cullen."

A/N: I know I know. If you've enjoyed what I've written so far, you're not so happy to leave you waiting. ): Just so much drama with my Hun and his crazy ex. Oh well, what are you gunna do?

+ I spent the last two weeks with my mum, and she likes to spoil her children.

+ Sorry for the terrible lemon, I got my friend to be more descriptive on his sexual relationships & all I could think was, "ouch." So, yeah, if it's terrible, HELP ME GET BETTER.

Question : Ever gotten dirty in public? C:


	10. I Wish

**Chapter Nine.**

Inhale.

Hold.

Exhale.

Inhale.

Hold.

Exhale.

I pulled the joint away from my lips and put it between Love's lips.

He closes his eyes and inhaled. I put my mouth close to his.

"Open your eyes," I told him. I sucked in the smoke he blew out. I pressed my mouth to his and dropped myself back on his bed.

I heard him put up the kush and put my lighter back in pocket of my jeans.

"I'm going out."

I opened one of my eyes to see him looking for his jeans in the pile of clothes next to his bed. "Oh. Where are you going?"

"To La Push."

I closed both my eyes again. "What for?"

"My friend need help with his family shop."

"His?"

He sighed. "Yes, Edward, his."

"Who?"

"Just some friend."

I sat up and stared at him through the mirror in the corner. "Who?"

He grabbed his keys and wallet. "Garrett."

I snickered. "The wanker?"

"No, my boyfriend."

And he walked out the door.

**-.-.-.-.-**

"So, what do you think? Coral or blue?"

I looked up from my phone's screen to Bella holding up two of the same dresses but in different colors.

"Bella, prom is 5 months away. You don't have to pick the dress now, what if you change your mind?"

She pouted and put the dresses back in the dressing room. "Have you still not talked to Jasper?"

I glanced back down to the black screen in my hands and sighed. "No."

"You guys have been friends since you were kids and I'm

sure have had plenty of fights, this'll be just like all the others and you guys will be back to being joined at the hip in no time." She said with a big grin on her face.

_I wish._

I looked up at her and smiled. "You're great, you know that, right?"

She sat on my lap and kissed my cheek. "You're pretty amazing yourself. And don't worry. Things will work out."

_I wish. _

**A/N: This is short because school starts the 27th. & I'm scared shitless of these awesome advanced classes my dad though would look super on college application. ohwell.**


	11. Waiting

"Hey, it's me. Again. Please call me back. Or come over later tonight. Or text me. I don't care. Just talk to me. I love you. Bye."

I hung up the phone and changed out of my practice clothes, grabbed my stuff and drove home.

I waited.

_Nothing_.

I waited.

_Nothing_.

I waited.

_Nothing_.

"Edward, your father's going to be home for dinner so freshen up and come downstairs."

"Okay, mom."

I checked my phone again for the millionth time today.

_Nothing_.

._._._.

"Jasper, please? Can you just come over? Just for a little while, I promise nothing will happen but us talking. I promise. Please?"

I waited.

Around 12:30 he finally called.

I debated whether I should answer or not.

I did.

"Hey."

"What do you want?"

"To talk."

"So talk."

I sighed. "I fucked up, Jazz."

He snorted. "No shit."

"I'm so sorry."

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"Okay."

"You forgive me?"

"No, but I accept your apology."

"Oh."

Silence.

"I love you."

"You really hurt me, Edward. I gave you everything and I get shit. I get to be your dirty, little secret that you like to fuck around with, that's only important to you when it's convenient."

_I had caused that hurt._

_I had fucked up._

_I had made him feel like he wasn't important to me. _

_Like I didn't love him. _

"No, baby, no. Fuck. You mean so much to me. I'd do anything for you. You're my all."

"Prove it."

I heard a click and the phone went dead.

**A/N: So. I can't wait until Christmas break, guys. Blahh.**

**I know I don't say this enough but, sursly guyz, you'r reviews LIGHT UP MY WORLD LIKE NOTHING ELSE. **

**onedirectioninfection anyone? Yes? No? **

**Question : You have a favorite boy band? (yes, the Beatles count. They were boys, they sang, and girls basically died when they sang.)**


	12. He Knows

**Frank Ocean's Orange album in the background. The man is pure talent. If you don't like him then I'm sorry you suck. **

Fake right.

Push through defense.

Shoot.

Miss.

_Fuck._

The goalie, Kevin Hunter from La Push, blocks the shot over the goal top post.

I line up the ball for a corner kick.

Tweeeeet.

I kick like I've been practicing all season.

The ball soars through the air and curves around the front post and hits the net.

_Goooooaaaaaal, motherfuckers!_

My teammates all run to me and we slide on out stomachs down the sideline.

Tweeeeetweetweeet.

The ref signals the end of the game and we all line up the middle of the field to tell the other team, "good game."

I look up and see Blue Eyes with Mom in their matching "Cullen" neon yellow shirts.

I smile at them and wave.

My smile goes wider when golden curls stands next to Bella, holding some if those nasty concession stand nachos.

My smile falls when the fucking wanker stands next to him and throws his arm around his neck to pull his head in for a kiss.

_The fucking boyfriend._

_The fucking hand-holding wanker._

_The fucking dipshit that's trying to take what's mine. _

I force a smile and jog over to them.

I kiss Bella and my Mom on the cheek.

I give Grey Eyes a tight smile and ignore the fucker to his side.

"I didn't believe Jasper when he told me but damn, Cullen, you've got skill." The fucker gave me smile and his grip on Grey Eye's tightened.

"Thanks…"

"Peter." He grinned. Japer gave me that you-know-his-name-asshole look.

"Right, Peter." I smirked.

"You ready to go?"

I looked down at Bella. "Yeah, just let me get me change and I'll be right out."

My red Nikes rubbed up and down his torn Chucks. He glared at me and leaned his head on the wanker's shoulders. I brought the top of Bella's head to me lips and smirked. He turns his head into the boyfriend neck and smiles.

We're at Applebee's and my Grey Eye's just like to push my limits.

He knows I'm jealous prick.

He knows I'm possessive.

He knows and he's still having his fun.

I take a bite out of my fry and step on his foot, a warning.

He shrugs his shoulders and takes a bite of his shrimp alfredo, grinning.

I know, you guys probably hate me ): I'm very sorry.

Believe me, I'm trying.

I love you so much.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter Twelve.**

When you love someone, you notice little details about them.

It could be how they lick their bottom lip and bite it before the smile at you,

or how they turn their head to the side when they flick their hair without touching it,

how they scrunch up their nose and mouth when they're on difficult calculus problem.

It's those little things that you learn to adore about the person.

When you love someone, you begin to learn all the little things that annoy them.

It could be when you pull on their golden curls,

or if you make out with your girlfriend in front of them,

how red-cheeked and ice-cold-grey they get when you have pissing contest with their fucking wanker of a boyfriend.

It's those little things that make you love that person so much fucking more.

"You're a fucking asshole, I hate you."

I looks to my side. "You don't hate me."

His glare intensified, "I want to hate you so much, I regret that night we first had sex, I regret everything that started this mess, since then you've only treated me like the side-line whore. I hate loving you, you fucki-"

I pressed my lips to his.

_So soft. _

_So warm._

_So fucking perfect. _

"I love you, Jasper."

A tear rolled down his cheek. "You'll never treat me how I deserve to be treated."

I pressed my lips to his again.

_I'm sorry. _

**A/N: uh. hi. **

**i'm sorry! **

**so, the reason i haven't updated since the last millennium is because, well, relationships and boys suck. *rolls eyes* wutevz **

**buuuuuut, I promise to update more frequently, at least once a week! **

**Question: what was your favorite class during high school?**


	14. Chapter 14

**Eating candy canes i found under my bed from christmas, a tub of frozen yogurt, skyping with my homies and Lana del Rey - Young and Beautiful in the background. In high school and i think my mother has a better social life. **

**Enjoy lovelies! xx**

**Chapter Trece**

"I hate the color gray."

_It's my favorite. _

"It's so dull and boring."

_It's so beautiful and bright._

"Why gray? Why not something bright or light, but gray? Ugh."

I rolled my eyes. "It's not that bad Bella, besides, I bet you won't even notice it when you're out there."

Sigh, "I have to wear this stupid suit to every game and pep rally, I will notice, Edward."

"Grey is one of my favorite colors."

She smiled, "Green is one of mine."

I smiled and kissed her head.

"Are you and Jasper still fighting?"

I shrugged. _Yes._

"Do you want to tell me what happened?"

I shrugged. _No_.

Bella sighed. "You're best friends, you'll work it out. I know you will."

I shrugged. _I hope so. _

"Edward! Hold up!"

_Fuck. _

"Got a minute?"

_Not for you, wanker._ "Sure, Garret."

"Listen, I was thinking that maybe you should call Jasper, he's been really bummed lately. And I know it had something to do with your little fight after dinner after the game."

"I doubt it has anything to so with that."

"Well, even if it doesn't, you should call him, I know you guys have been best friends since you were kids, he'll probably talk to you."

"I don't kno-"

"Please? You're his best friend."

I sighed. "Okay. I'll try."

"What?"

"Hello to you, too, love. I missed you, too. I'm great, school is okay, life is okay, except for the person i love won't even fucking talk to me. Can you believe that, Jasper? He hasn't even looked in my direction in a fucking week."

He stayed silent for a while. "What do you want, Edward."

"You, naked, in my bed. Wrapped around my cock."

"I'm hanging up."

"I'm sorry."

He sighed, "Call me when you mean it."

_**OH MY FUCK. WHO IS EXCITED FOR GATSBY**_

_**meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee**_

_**gahh, I read the book in 8th grade and oh my gawwwwwwd. **_

_**super excited.**_

_**So, I've decided Wednesday & Fridays will be days i update! Yay! :D **_

_**I didn't get to this Wednesday because i ran this 5k for this little baby in my little ol' Texas town that has this disease that causes tumors in her brain, so she goes to chemotherapy i think twice a month, she's only 10 months old, over 700 people signed up for this 5k, it's amazing how people come together to help a baby. She's a fighter. **_

_**"God is good."**_

_**Review, Subscribe, Favorite! **_

_**Aaaan follow my current addiction: -dot-com**_

_**- lots of loveeeee! **_

_**Carmen. (:**_


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